Inconvenient Truth #1:
Your endless scrolling on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube and uncountable Snapchat stories are keeping you from building the life you want. Because it is far easier to be distracted from the work you know you need to do than it is to instill the discipline needed to achieve what you desire. Your choice to evade short term pain will slowly steal your soul. Slowly, those few minutes spent scrolling and swiping apps become hours, days, and years compounded. And you can't get that time back. Yet, few will do anything to change this, and playing the "I'm addicted" victim card won't save you either. You and only you made these choices. You and only you will have to live with the time you decided to lose.
Inconvenient Truth #2:
The "Sexual Revolution" has brought with it the following:
> Every form of birth control imaginable under the sun
> Mass abortion
> A widespread hook-up & divorce culture
> Families started outside of wedlock
> Children whose parents want nothing to do with the responsibility of raising them, and raising them right
>The single-mother epidemic which gave us:
> Daughters that begrudge men
> Fragile sons incapable of becoming the men they need to become
> Complete disconnect between sex & responsibility
> A society whose people are being empowered to lose any and all forms of self-control by the minute because there are now so many medications available today that no longer require or incentivize the user to exercise it
> A plethora of "dating" apps and services in which no real, true, or meaningful relationships can be built upon and in which feed the ongoing cycle of point #3
There is nothing good coming out of this. This is not progress. This is not actually a "Revolution".
What it is is a cancer that is breaking down the values, systems, and structures which have stood the test of time to pave the foundation for what is a strong and stable civilization, society, and family unit.
It is a cancer that is anything but the mark of freedom. It is not freedom from responsibility, and certainly isn't freedom of "no strings attached". Because freedom does not come without a cost. The price will be paid, sooner or later.
It is a system that, over time, will render unsustainable because it has no foundation for itself. No principles, no values, no order. Not sustainable.
It is a system that will have far graver consequences in the end than the consequences we are seeing now or could even imagine at this very moment. And No, what we are seeing today isn't because of "modern times". That statement is nothing more than an excuse to justify the abomination of all that is happening now, when, contrary to popular thought, there is nothing to justify.
Few are willing to hear this, and even fewer are able to see it for what it really is. And for those of us who do, almost no one is willing to suspend their ignorance to call it out. A blind eye can only be turned for so long...
Inconvenient Truth #3:
A "comfortable lifestyle" - the lifestyle you were told you wanted - is a lifestyle that will keep you where you are now for the rest of your life.
A comfortable lifestyle is one of imminent stagnation and provides an environment in which any aspirations for progress are entirely diminished.
It is a lifestyle in which no adversity is ever experienced, failures are rewarded because you "participated", and no lessons truly learned because no challenge is ever faced and no failure is too great.
It is a lifestyle that strips away any ambition you might have had to produce something great because binge watching Netflix after 8 hours of sitting around in your office all day made you feel "rejuvenated".
It is a lifestyle paramount on filling your life with distractions from the things that matter. When's the last time you were at a family gathering and everyone put their iPhones away?
It is a lifestyle that fooled you into thinking life and the world owed you something or deserved everything when life and the world owe you nothing at all.
It is a lifestyle that made you lose all respect for yourself because when you look back on all the time you wasted being comfortable, you realize you have nothing valuable to offer anyone or anything.
It is a lifestyle that earned you a one-time-a-year financed vacation to the Bahamas so you could tell Instagram how great you are for travelling. Now you have to work the rest of the year to pay it off, but that's okay because Netflix is there for you after work.
It is a lifestyle that puts you into a perpetuous cycle of grand idea thinking, but restrains you from taking any action because you are content with your mediocrity. You'll be an idea factory for life, but you will have built nothing.
It is a lifestyle that commends you for your self indulgences rather than for your self accomplishments.
It is a lifestyle that drains you of your energy because your work is meaningless to you and you only do it so you can keep things as they are. Stagnation. You know what you have is secure and so any sort of risk-taking is unfathomable. This lifestyle makes you soft.
It is a lifestyle that keeps you indecisive on the best thing to distract yourself with in the moment and inhibits your ability to focus on a long term vision to build your own future. Your decision-making processes are completely out of alignment, big and small. And yes, those seemingly trivial decisions do matter - they're the ones that compound over time.
It is a lifestyle that, contrary to what you were told you wanted, is a cancer that will allow you to take with you to the grave every last regret of achievements unmet and progress unmade because the todays' you put off for tomorrow never came again.
You do not want to live a comfortable lifestyle. The lifestyle is a lie.
My kids will know this.
Inconvenient Truth #4:
The toxic relationships you are holding onto are slowly draining your soul.
The "friends" in your life who continuously blow you off but still call you a "good friend" of theirs are not friends. They are bottom feeders, reaching out only when it’s convenient for them, using you as a backup option until something better comes along for next Friday night. But, you let it go on time after time, so you remain a "good friend" to them. When's the last time you actually did something together because you both wanted to and it wasn't the last option for the other party?
The family member who berates you on your every move may be a blood relative, but they are not family. This is a person angry at themselves for not becoming the person they wanted to be and refuses to take any actions for themselves to better their own circumstances. They take out their frustrations on you for aspiring to a better life. Yet you justify hearing their opinion or weighing their thoughts on your decisions because they are "family". And how's that worked out so far for you? Where are they and where are you?
The boyfriend/girlfriend you fight with all the time is hurting you more than you know. Fighting has become so commonplace between you two that you now think it has become a state of normalcy. This, however, is no state of normalcy. Unhealthy is not normal. The negativity festering in your daily ritual of fighting spreads like a virus, and not just between you two, but to everyone else around you. But again you think it's normal. Eventually, all the pent up hurt, anger, and every other emotion imaginable, becomes a ticking time bomb. The explosion is bound to happen, doomsday cannot be avoided. The result will be a trail of despair that, when looked back on, will be alive and well with innumerable sorrows. But you've told yourself that you deserve nothing better and having someone is ultimately better than going it alone or starting anew. So you settle, and you stay miserable. A life of sorrow and hurt it is.
The obnoxious co-worker you spend your lunch with who won't shut up about the news is slowly making you believe that if you aren't outraged or afraid of what you are being told by some clown in front of a camera, then you are truly not living. What a life Jimmy has. Nothing more important going on in his own life than the news. Poor Jimmy. But you'd rather not be alone on lunch. And forget the fact that you have the option to go and do whatever you want on lunch. You tolerate the constant inflow of negative this and negative that. It's an endless, vicious cycle of bullshit that you keep tolerating, and you wonder why you are so tired and drained all the time. Newsflash: The news is hardly ever positive - their money is made by instilling fear and outrage in the masses, and little does your co-worker Jimmy know that he is the same guinea pig the media uses to spread the horseshit gossip. But, it's way easier to just keep doing what you're used to and being around the people you are used to, so it's OK. Maybe that person is "just the way the are" you conclude. Your justification is laughable, but I'm not telling you to change them. You need to change your environment on your own, or be consumed by its nature - for better, or worse. Time will tell you this - you won't be able to hide your slowly draining energy long term. Soon, you will suffer, if you aren't already.
Toxic relationships may not be easy to identify at first, but when identified, should be ended immediately. No explanation needed. Ignore, delete numbers, burn the bridges, move the fuck on. Avoid toxic people like the plague or be infected by the plague. Whether you realize it now or not, you become like the people you spend the most time with.
Most people’s relationships today are also transactional and temporary. Harness the ones that aren't transactional because transactional is not everlasting. If you're struggling with friends, go get involved in that hobby you've been putting off and meet new people, because the ones you're hanging on to blowing you off all the time are the ones not worth one more second of your time. Time is the one asset you have that you can never get back.
If this sounds harsh to you, then let this be a reminder that life isn't fair. Keep in mind what these kind of relationships have done to you up until now, and what would become of you if you wasted any more time investing in them. These relationships, truthfully though, are not investments. Throw away the garbage, or throw away your time. The choice is yours.
Inconvenient Truth #5:
Your life is your fault.
Every decision you've made, every choice you've made - the consequences you live with, good or bad, are your fault.
Few will internalize this, because it is easier to point the finger elsewhere for your shortcomings and disappointments than it is to take ownership for everything that happens to you in your life.
To blame is to lose, and looking the other way when something doesn't go your way is not going to offload the responsibility you have to change or fix the situation. You will still go on losing as pointing fingers changes nothing.
We have been conditioned to look outward and rarely inward to evaluate why or how something happened to us. And rarely does this work to our advantage - Our lives do not change after we place responsibility on someone or something else. We might have a temporary, fleeting moment of superiority that, after we point the finger, makes us *feel* superior and entitled to better circumstances, but the end result is still the same: Nothing changes and nothing will ever change. Pointing fingers and lack of emotional control gets us nowhere.
The new business you started that failed shortly after is your fault.
The job you can't get because you went to a $70,000 a year private school for gender studies is your fault.
The maxed out credit card you've incurred because you needed to show the world your Instagram account every year from the Bahamas is your fault.
The friends you lost and the relationships you destroyed because of something you did to hurt them is your fault.
The life you hate going back to on Mondays is your fault.
The poor judgement of character you have is your fault.
Your poor health is your fault.
You tolerating being treated poorly by the people you surround yourself with is your fault.
The dream you had 10 years ago of what your life would be like if you had done A, B, and C but didn't do is also your fault.
The New Year's resolutions you keep trying year over year over year that fall flat is, again, your fault.
The universe doesn't care. And it never will care. You singling yourself out for a pity party will not help you either. This is contrary to the role greater society plays in this - It celebrates you for whatever form of "oppression" you are a "victim" of. It wants you this way. But it's all a load of bullshit. Modern culture wants you to feel oppressed and like you need to be that way so as to keep you exactly where you are.
The world's smallest violin doesn't play for you. You will pay the price for all of the choices you make - good and bad - and all the decisions you make - big and small - good or bad. The universe only cares about the value you add to it and to the lives of those around you, which your pity party surely provides none of.
And even if you come up with one "exception" to this truth, treat it as though it still were your fault so you can actually do something about it.
This is why this truth will be so hard to internalize - No one wants to accept blame and work to fix things or change things to the way they'd rather them be. However, it is the first step to changing how you play the game that is your life.
The perpetual cycle of the "poor me" garbage you tell yourself will forever keep you where you are.
The justifications you tell yourself for the "woe is me party" are laughable, and so is the lack of ownership you take to fix the things in your life that you don't like.
The world owes you nothing for the accountability you refuse to take.
The sense of entitlement you feel owed is a fantasy. No one and nothing owes you shit, and they never will owe you shit.
Your life will only begin to change when you decide to take everything into your own hands. Everything.
There will always be consequences for every single decision and choice you make.
And your life is, and always will be, your fault.